Not Time to Send for the Colonel
Colonel Clinton B. Fisk, leading a regiment of ministers and religious men, promises to handle any necessary swearing himself. At muddy Helena, a teamster named John curses when his wagon’s breeching breaks on a steep hill. Reminded of the colonel’s promise, John explains that the swearing could not wait because Fisk was absent, leaving the colonel unable to reprove him.
By Annie Wittenmyer · First published 1895 · Genre: Historical Anecdote, Civil War Literature, Humor · 501 words
First lines
Clinton B. Fisk was chosen colonel of a regiment made up largely of ministers and religious men. The morality of the regiment was a matter of favorable comment, not only in the camp where they were drilled before leaving the State, but also as they advanced down the Mississippi River. Some one suggested that Colonel Fisk should do the swearing of the regiment, as he was "as religious as a preacher."
The colonel, who was not to be nonplussed by such a proposition, readily accepted the duty, the men all assenting.
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Genres
- Historical Anecdote — The piece recounts a brief, presumably factual Civil War-era incident involving Colonel Clinton B. Fisk and his regiment.
- Civil War Literature — Its setting, military organization, river travel, camp life, and references to Helena, Arkansas, place it within the American Civil War context.
- Humor — The central exchange relies on comic timing and wordplay: the teamster excuses his profanity by saying the colonel was unavailable to perform the necessary swearing.
- Military Nonfiction — The narrative concerns soldiers, officers, discipline, supply transport, camp conditions, and the informal culture of a Union regiment.
Tags
American Civil War · Union Army · military camp life · Helena, Arkansas · Mississippi River · Civil War era · anecdote · humorous sketch · religious soldiers · ministers in uniform · military discipline · swearing and profanity
What this Textopian page supports
Not Time to Send for the Colonel is listed on Textopian as a short story by Annie Wittenmyer, dated 1895 CE.
This source record anchors work identity, reading entry points, and catalog context for checking claims about the work.
- Work type: Short story
- Author: Annie Wittenmyer
- Date: 1895 CE
- Language: English
- Genres: Historical Anecdote, Civil War Literature, Humor, Military Nonfiction, Biographical Sketch
- Length: 501 words
- Structure: 1 section, 10 paragraphs
- Reading fit: Fairly Easy (7th Grade)
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- Work identity for Not Time to Send for the Colonel by Annie Wittenmyer
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