The Exit of Battling Billson

The Exit of Battling Billson

The story begins with Ukridge, a man known for his schemes and adventures, getting into trouble at an Oddfellows' Hall in Llunindnno. He is involved in a boxing match between Lloyd Thomas and Wilberforce Billson, where Billson emerges victorious after delivering a knockout punch to Thomas. However, the victory is short-lived as Ukridge discovers that their promoter, Mr. Previn, has bolted with all the money from the event. Ukridge returns home to his small sitting room in Caerleon Street, where he and his friend are trying to come to terms with the disaster. Just then, a man arrives at the door claiming to be Mr. Previn's partner. He informs them that Previn has indeed bolted with all the money, including the twenty pounds owed to Lloyd Thomas. Ukridge is furious and demands that the man hand over the money. However, just as things are about to escalate, Wilberforce Billson bursts in, having met Mr. Previn on his way to the hall and taken a small bag of money from him. The bag jingles with coins as he places it on the table, much to Ukridge's delight. With the money recovered, Ukridge is overjoyed and thanks Billson for his bravery. However, Billson apologizes for not stopping Previn earlier and takes his leave, leaving Ukridge and his friend to ponder their next move. The story ends with Ukridge laughing maniacally as he contemplates his next scheme, while his friend looks on in amusement.

By P. G. Wodehouse · First published 1907 · Genre: Humor, Short Story, Comedy · 8,691 words

First lines

The Theatre Royal, Llunindnno, is in the middle of the principal thoroughfare of that repellent town, and immediately opposite its grubby main entrance there is a lamppost. Under this lamppost, as I approached, a man was standing. He was a large man, and his air was that of one who has recently passed through some trying experience. There was dust on his person, and he had lost his hat. At the sound of my footsteps he turned, and the rays of the lamp revealed the familiar features of my old friend Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge.

"Great Scot! " I ejaculated. "What are you doing here? "

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The Exit of Battling Billson is listed on Textopian as a novel by P. G. Wodehouse, dated 1907 CE.

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humor · comedy · satire · British literature · short story · character-driven · social class · romance · witty dialogue · absurdity · lighthearted · entertainment

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