Read "Two of a Trade" by W.W. Jacobs online for free on Textopian. Full text with search, annotations, highlights, and AI-powered reading aids.
E's a nero, that's wot 'e is, sir," said the cook, as he emptied a / boiler of dirty water overboard.
"A what? " said the skipper.
"A nero," said the cook, speaking very slowly and distinctly. "A nero in / real life, a chap wot, speaking for all for'ard, we're proud to have / aboard along with us."
"I didn't know he was much of a swimmer," said the skipper, glancing / curiously at a clumsily-built man of middle age, who sat on the hatch / glancing despondently at the side.
"No more 'e ain't," said the cook, "an' that's what makes 'im more / 'eroish still in my own opinion."
"Did he take his clothes off? " inquired the mate.
"Not a bit of it," said the delighted cook; "not a pair of trowsis, nor / even 'is 'at, which was sunk."
"You're a liar, cook," said the hero, looking up for a moment.
"You didn't take your trowsis off, George? " said the cook anxiously.
"I chucked my 'at on the pavement," growled George, without looking up.
"Well, anyway, you went over the Embankment after that pore girl like a / Briton, didn't you? " said the other.
There was no reply.
"Didn't you? " said the cook appealingly.
"Did you expect me to go over like a Dutchman, or wot? " demanded George / fiercely.
"That's 'is modesty," said the cook, turning to the others with the air / of a showman. "E can't bear us to talk about it Nearly drownded 'e was. / All but, and a barge came along and shoved a boat-hook right through the / seat of his trowsis an' saved 'im. Stand up an' show 'em your trowsis, / George."
"If I do stand up," said George, in a voice broken with rage, "it'll be / a bad day for you, my lad."
"Ain't he modest? " said the cook. "Don't it do you good to 'ear 'im? He / was just like that when they got him ashore and the crowd started / patting him."
"Didn't like it? " queried the mate.
"Well, they overdid it a little, p'raps," admitted the cook; "one old / chap wot couldn't get near patted 'is 'ead with 'is stick, but it was / all meant in the way of kindness."
"I'm proud of you, George," said the skipper heartily.