Lines to a Don by Hilaire Belloc — Read

Remote and ineffectual Don / That dared attack my Chesterton, / With that poor weapon, half-impelled, / Unlearnt, unsteady, hardly held, / Unworthy for a tilt with men -- / Your quavering and corroded pen; / Don poor at Bed and worse at Table, / Don pinched, Don starved, Don miserable; / Don stuttering, Don with roving eyes, / Don nervous, Don of crudities; / Don clerical, Don ordinary, / Don self-absorbed and solitary; / Don here-and-there, Don epileptic; / Don puffed and empty, Don dyspeptic; / Don middle-class, Don sycophantic, / Don dull, Don brutish, Don pedantic; / Don hypocritical, Don bad, / Don furtive, Don three-quarters mad; / Don (since a man must make an end), / Don that shall never be my friend.

Don different from those regal Dons!