Judge Lu by Pu Songling — Read

At Ling-yang there lived a man named Chu Erh-tan, whose literary designation[1] was Hsiao-ming. He was a fine manly fellow, but an egregious dunce, though he tried hard to learn. One day he was taking wine with a number of fellow-students, when one of them said to him, by way of a joke, "People credit you with plenty of pluck. Now, if you will go in the middle of the night to the Chamber of Horrors,[2] and bring back the Infernal Judge from the left-hand porch, we'll all stand you a dinner. " For at Ling-yang there was a representation of the Ten Courts of Purgatory, with the Gods and devils carved in wood, and almost life-like in appearance; and in the eastern vestibule there was a full-length image of the Judge with a green face, and a red beard, and a hideous expression in his features. Sometimes sounds of examination under the whip were heard to issue during the night from both porches, and persons who went in found their hair standing on end from fear; so the other young men thought it would be a capital test for Mr. Chu. Thereupon Chu smiled, and rising from his seat went straight off to the temple; and before many minutes had elapsed they heard him shouting outside, "His Excellency has arrived! " At this they all got up, and in came Chu with the image on his back, which he proceeded to deposit on the table, and then poured out a triple libation in its honour. His comrades who were watching what he did, felt ill at ease, and did not like to resume their seats; so they begged him to carry the Judge back again. But he first poured some wine upon the ground, invoking the image as follows: -- "I am only a fool-hardy, illiterate fellow: I pray Your Excellency excuse me. My house is close by, and whenever Your Excellency feels so disposed I shall be glad to take a cup of wine with you in a friendly way. " He then carried the Judge back, and the next day his friends gave him the promised dinner, from which he went home half-tipsy in the evening. But not feeling that he had had enough, he brightened up his lamp, and helped himself to another cup of wine, when suddenly the bamboo curtain was drawn aside, and in walked the Judge. Mr. Chu got up and said, "Oh, dear! Your Excellency has come to cut off my head for my rudeness the other night. " The Judge parted his thick beard, and smiling, replied, "Nothing of the kind. You kindly invited me last night to visit you; and as I have leisure this evening, here I am. " Chu was delighted at this, and made his guest sit down, while he himself wiped the cups and lighted a fire.[3] "It's warm weather," said the Judge; "let's drink the wine cold. " Chu obeyed, and putting the bottle on the table, went out to tell his servants to get some supper. His wife was much alarmed when she heard who was there, and begged him not to go back; but he only waited until the things were ready, and then returned with them. They drank out of each other's cups,[4] and by-and-by Chu asked the name of his guest. "My name is Lu," replied the Judge; "I have no other names. " They then conversed on literary subjects, one capping the other's quotation as echo responds to sound. The Judge then asked Chu if he understood composition; to which he answered that he could just tell good from bad; whereupon the former repeated a little infernal poetry which was not very different from that of mortals. He was a deep drinker, and took off ten goblets at a draught; but Chu who had been at it all day, soon got dead drunk and fell fast asleep with his head on the table. When he waked up the candle had burnt out and day was beginning to break, his guest having already departed; and from this time the Judge was in the habit of dropping in pretty often, until a close friendship sprang up between them. Sometimes the latter would pass the night at the house, and Chu would show him his essays, all of which the Judge scored and underlined as being good for nothing. One night Chu got tipsy and went to bed first, leaving the Judge drinking by himself.

[1]: Every Chinese man and woman inherits a family name or surname. A woman takes her husband's surname, followed in official documents by her maiden name. Children usually have a pet name given to them soon after birth, which is dropped after a few years. Then there is the _ming_ or name, which once given is unchangeable, and by which the various members of a family are distinguished. But only the father and mother and certain other relatives are allowed to use this. Friends call each other by their literary designations or "book-names," which are given generally by the teacher to whom the boy's education is first entrusted. Brothers and sisters and others have all kinds of nick-names as with us. Dogs and cats are called by such names as "Blackey," "Whitey," "Yellowy," "Jewel," "Pearly," &c., &c. Junks are christened "Large Profits," "Abounding Wealth," "Favourite of Fortune," &c., &c. Places are often named after some striking geographical feature; _e.g._, _Hankow_ -- "mouth of the Han river," _i.e._, its point of junction with the Yang-tsze; or they have fancy names, such as _Fuhkien_ -- "happily established; " _Tientsin_ -- "Heaven's ford; " or names implying a special distinction, such as _Nanking_ -- "southern capital; " _Shan-tung_ -- "east of the mountains," &c.