To -- "the J. W. R. Literary Club"

Well, it's enough to turn his head to have a feller's name / Swiped with a _Literary_ Club! -- But _you're_ the ones to blame! -- / I call the World to witness that I never _agged_ ye to it / By ever writin' _Classic-like_ -- _because I couldn't_ do it: / I never run to "Hellicon," ner writ about "Per-nassus," / Ner ever tried to rack or ride around on old "P-_gassus_"! / When "Tuneful Nines" has cross'd my lines, the ink 'ud blot and blur it, / And pen 'ud jest putt back fer home, and take the short way fer it! / And so, as I'm a-sayin', -- when you name your Literary / In honor o' this name o' mine, it's railly nessessary -- / Whilse I'm _a-thankin'_ you and all -- to _warn_ you, ef you do it, / I'll haf to jine the thing myse'f 'fore I can live up to it!