Explore "Shrewsbury" by Stanley J. Weyman on Textopian. Read with annotations and highlights.
Doubtless there have been men able to boast, and with truth, that they carried to their first assignation with a woman an even pulse. But as I do not presume to rank myself among these, who have been commonly men of high station (of whom my late Lord Rochester was, I believe, the chief in my time), neither -- the unhappy occurrence which I am in the way to relate, notwithstanding -- -have I, if I may say so without disrespect, so little heart as to crave the reputation. In truth, I experienced that evening, as I crept out of the back door of Mr. D -- -- 's house, and stole into the gloom of the whispering garden, a full share of the guilty feeling that goes with secrecy; and more than my share of the agitation of spirit natural in one who knows (and is new to the thought) that under cover of the darkness a woman stands trembling and waiting for him. A few paces from the house -- which I could leave without difficulty, though at the risk of detection -- I glanced back to assure myself that all was still: then shivering, as much with excitement as at the chill greeting the night air gave me, I hastened to the gap in the fence, through which I had before seen my mistress.
I felt for the gap with my hand and peered through it, and called her name softly -- "Jennie! Jennie! " and listened; and after an interval called again, more boldly. Still hearing nothing, I discovered by the sinking at my heart -- which was such that, for all my eighteen years, I could have sat down and cried -- how much I had built on her coming. And I called again and again; and still got no answer.