The Getting of Wisdom by Henry Handel Richardson

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Da regiert der Nachbar, da wird man Nachbar. / Nietzsche

You might regulate your outward habit to the last button of what you were expected to wear; you might conceal the tiny flaws and shuffle over the big improprieties in your home life, which were likely to damage your value in the eyes of your companions; you might, in brief, march in the strictest order along the narrow road laid down for you by these young lawgivers, keeping perfect step and time with them: yet of what use were all your pains, if you could not marshal your thoughts and feelings -- the very realest part of you -- in rank and file as well? . if these persisted in escaping control? -- Such was the question which, about this time, began to present itself to Laura's mind.

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