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The fair and honest proposition in which I offered to communicate / privately with parents and guardians, relative to two new and lucrative / professions which I had discovered, has, I find from the publisher, / elicited not one single inquiry from those personages, who I can't but / think are very little careful of their children's welfare to allow / such a chance to be thrown away. It is not for myself I speak, as my / conscience proudly tells me; for though I actually gave up Ascot in / order to be in the way should any father of a family be inclined to / treat with me regarding my discoveries, yet I am grieved, not on my own / account, but on theirs, and for the wretched penny-wise policy that has / held them back.
That they must feel an interest in my announcement is unquestionable. / Look at the way in which the public prints of all parties have noticed / my appearance in the character of a literary man! Putting aside my / personal narrative, look at the offer I made to the nation, -- a choice / of no less than two new professions! Suppose I had invented as many new / kinds of butcher's meat; does any one pretend that the world, tired as / it is of the perpetual recurrence of beef, mutton, veal, cold beef, cold / veal, cold mutton, hashed ditto, would not have jumped eagerly at the / delightful intelligence that their old, stale, stupid meals were about / to be varied at last?